The Super-Duper Dr. L

For anyone who might be keeping track: we still are a no-go on the b-a-b-y. We went to a fertility specialist today. And here's a little peek at how the appointment went...

In walks a short, youngish guy in a mustard yellow shirt and brown pants. He has a kind of skittish excitability that is sort of likeable in a manic kind of way. He introduces himself to us, and I like him right off the bat. Until he says to Ryan "Oh, so this must be your daughter" Really, dude? A paternity joke at a infertility appointment? Whatevs.

So basically this is the conversation that followed. Verbatim. Ok, not verbatim. But close.

Fertility Doc. (We'll call him Dr. L from this point on): "Oh, whoa, hey. So how long have you guys been goin' at this thing?"

Me:"Almost 2 years."
Ryan: "It's been a while." Way to undersell, honey.

Dr. L (while looking at our file) "Yeah, whoa, well, you guys are super-duper infertile" (Are you allowed to say 'super-duper' if you have a medical degree? I'm guessing not and I actually just added that myself.) "Yeah, well, ok, so the Naturopath you guys went to was a quack, and I don't really get why he made you do half the stuff you did" (Yeah, caught that, thanks. Let's also skip the part about how he misread our test results, mmk??) "So basically we have to figure out what's going on here or your only option is ICSI. You can't even do an IUI at this point unless we get this stuff lookin' better, ya know?" (Yeah, actually, I did know that. And the thought of an ICSI makes me want to punch myself in the face. Don't know what an ICSI is?? Oh, only THE most hardcore fertility option out there. FOR 16 THOUSAND DOLLARS!! I added a link for anyone who wants the deets. "So here's what we're gonna do. We're gonna repeat a test you've already done 5 times (awesome, all of which we've paid out of pocket for, but sure lets repeat it, what the heck!) and do some blood work, and come back in two weeks and we can talk about all our options"

Ryan nods, and I just blink at him.

Dr. L: "Oh, and thanks for the $200 bucks for the 20 minute appointment!" Ok, he didn't actually say that last part, but that's basically how it was. 

Brutal.

So we know basically no more than we did before the appointment, we have to wait another 2 weeks, and we're out another $200 bucks. With a couple hundred more to shortly follow by the time we get even close to figuring out how to avoid an ICSI or IVF if at all possible. Super. Duper. (See, I can say it because all I have is a Bachelor's). 

I'm making this guy sound like a total jerk. He really, truly wasn't. It's just a crappy situation and it's nice to be able to put the blame somewhere else. He and his mustard shirt get the most of it today.

Though, towards the end of the appointment it came up that Ryan cant swallow pills. Which I tease him for mercilessly. So when Dr. L hears this he pauses for a second, looks at Ryan and says "What are you, six??" And I laughed the whoollleee way home.

Partly because it was funny.
And partly to keep myself from crying.

Life's funny, isn't it??